One night I all of a sudden felt like I was going to get sick and started sweating profusely. My stomach was hurting and I knew if I didn’t lay down I was going to be hugging the toilet. When think about what could be wrong I could only think of two things…food poisoning or I had double dosed when I took my 600mg ibuprofen.
No one else was sick and we had all ate the same meals. After thinking about it, I realized the most likely scenario was that I took my medicine at 8 & 9pm as the stomach pains/nausea started soon after what would have been my second dose.
This is very likely because at some point durning the early newborn stage I caught myself about to take 1200mg of ibuprofen. In my sleepy state I was mixing up the dosage for Tylenol and ibuprofen.
When baby E was a few weeks old my son knocked over a drink and managed to soak his clothes and get a large portion of our living room floor wet and sticky. I quickly cleaned up the mess with hands towels and got my toddler in new clothes. Later while picking up I realized I threw the dirty towels and clothes in the trash can instead of the dirty laundry. I would have never believed that I had managed to do that if I hadn’t found the clothes in the trash myself!
This embarrassing moment is pretty gross, so advert your eyes if you aren’t ready for what I am about to tell you. This all started when my allergies went CRAZY leaving me with a sinus and ear infection.
For weeks, I have not been able to hear out of my left ear. I have taken antibiotics TWICE (weeks apart) and my hearing hasn’t improved. I finally went to an ENT specialist. The conclusion: I had fluid in my ears that wouldn’t dry up. (SUPER GROSS, I know!) In order to hear, the fluid needed to be drained from my ear. So I decided to have a minor in office surgery done, called a myringotomy. A myringtomy is a medical procedure where they cut a small hole in the eardrum and use a vacuum to suck fluid out. The procedure went great. It was super weird and made me dizzy, but it worked. I could instantly hear better. I wasn’t back to 100% but it was better than it had been in weeks.
After the procedure, the doctor told me what medications I would need and wrote me some prescriptions. He also put some drops in my ear and packed it with cotton. After that I was off to fill my prescriptions.
When I was driving to get my medications my hearing was going in and out, so I decided to take the cotton out of my ear to fully test my hearing. THIS WAS A MISTAKE. When I took the cotton out it was saturated from the drops but I didn’t think much of it.
So I arrive at my local grocery store and learn it will be 15 minutes to get my prescriptions filled. I fill all my prescriptions there since I can grocery shop while I wait. While I’m browsing the aisles, a moment of horror hits. I can feel liquid dripping from my ear. Gross, thick yellowy fluid is running out of my ear. Of course the grocery store is packed and my stash of tissues in my purse is gone. (Thanks to my lovely allergies). I had nothing to wipe it away with.
I was mortified. After having a small panic attack and what felt like several pain-stakingly long minutes I remembered that there were tissues at the pharmacy counter.
This felt like the equivalent of having food in your teeth at a meeting. Luckily (I think?) it was only strangers that saw me walking around looking like a mess.
This is one of those things that I believe most anyone could manage to do. Well at least I hope so. It kind of surprises me how this did occur. I write it off as I was really tired and sort of busy that morning but who knows. I did manage to pass several mirrors and never notice what would be the talk of my coworkers later that day….
What am I talking about? Well I’ll tell ya.
I walked around all day a few Wednesdays ago with my shirt inside out. Luckily for me, my jacket was on the majority of the day. So I’m pretty sure while the jacket was on, no one was aware that I apparently have problems dressing myself.
My wardrobe malfunction was discovered by the same coworker that saw my size sticker on my cardigan a while back. While she was helping me with a project I decided to take my jacket off because I was hot. Yup, that’s when my little secret, even to myself, was out. My lovely coworker looked at me and politely told me that she believed my shirt was on inside out as she could see a tag at the side seam of my shirt AND one by my collar! For the time I was at my desk, everyone around had heard our exchange, so I left my jacket off till I cooled off. I told my coworker the next time I went to the restroom I would flip my shirt inside out or outside in, whichever would right it.
What is sad, however…is that I went to the restroom multiple times that day and NEVER did remember to fix my shirt. At some point I got cold and had put my jacket back on which means most people weren’t privileged to the fact that I dressed myself like a toddler.
It still surprises me at how much I was embarrassed, yet I never corrected the problem. I guess I was really wrapped up in work that day!
I am giving myself the challenge of not having anymore wardrobe issues while at work. One would think that this would be an easy think to do. But I can never be so sure now!
The other weekend we went to a 1 year old, super hero birthday party. The birthday boy was the son of my husband’s boss. I had never met this boss so I was a little nervous, going in to everything. Will I have people to talk to? Will everyone be dressed up? Crap. I don’t have anything super hero for me or Landon! We ended up settling for this batman outfit. He’s cute in it, but it’s not really a super hero costume.
So we got there and everything was going well. The people were friendly. L turned out to have one of the best outfits. (Let’s just say the other kids weren’t very festive.) And they had yummy food and snacks. My embarrassment came in to play when the kids decided to play “pin the batman emblem on batman”. All the parents were distracted with the game, when I saw the birthday boy crawling away for a bunch of not-baby-friendly stuff on a set of book shelves. It looked like nick-knacks of some sort, small enough for a baby to choke on. Since, I was the only one that noticed I scooped up the birthday boy and started playing and talking to him. The Dad (who is M’s boss) walked over and talked to me for a couple of minutes and had this weird look on his face and insisted on taking back his son. I couldn’t figure out why, he was giggling and happy. It was fun holding a smaller baby the difference in weight was amazing and he is only a two months younger than L. I insisted that I didn’t mind holding the little guy, but could tell the dad wanted him back. After I handed him over I realized, why he wanted him back. The little guy had pulled down my tank top to where a good portion of my girls and bra was exposed. I guess I was too caught up in cute-little-baby to notice. I quickly shifted my shirt back into its proper place. I felt like an idiot because I’m pretty sure I made the dad feel uncomfortable. It’s embarrassing because I really had no idea. But overall I know that I made sure the little guy didn’t get into anything that was trouble. I may of inadvertently flashed more of myself than intended, however, I can live with that.
Sometimes you have to laugh at yourself and today I definitely did. This was one of those embarrassing MOMents, that I can’t even blame on the baby! Let me explain…
Tonight, my husband, Landon, and I went to Apple-bee’s for dinner after a frantic search for a healthy cookbook. I had packed the “going to a restaurant with baby” essentials. For me this includes: the peel and stick place mat, a bib, a baby food pouch, a spoon, bowl, wipes, puffs, lil crunchies, wagon wheels, and CHEERIOS. For the most part it was a normal dinner except for this little bit of convo that happened…
- ME: Wow, this sauce is really rich and buttery. I don’t think I can eat any more. But it is good.
- HUSBAND: Does that mean I can have your shrimp?
- LANDON: BA, BA, BA, BA (as he eats his Cheerios)
- ME: I think I’m going to eat some Cheerios as a buffer for my stomach. It should work like crackers, right? Since I haven’t ate a lot today….
- HUSBAND: (gives a nod that says, sure babe-whatever you say)
- ME: (nom, nom, nom, just eating my cheerios)
- SERVER: How is everything tonight?
- ME & HUSBAND: Great!
- SERVER: Mam, are you sure everything is ok?
- ME: Oh yes, it’s just fine.
- SERVER: (in a gentle and concerned voice) I’m sorry, Mam. I don’t believe you. You are eating Cheerios.
- ME: (thinking…crap…he has a point…I haven’t finished my dinner, and I stole my son’s cheerios…) Oh, my dinner is fine. I promise.
- LANDON: Ooooh (and smiles sweetly, he likes having the last word already)
A few minutes later, the manager came to our table and asked how everything was going.
What a night!